Everyone wants to live a long life with their beloved people, and they hope that it will be full of bright moments, stunning views, and sincere joy. Many people meet their partners, having already lived half of life, and some of them have come a long way to marry a Russian girl and become happy. However, unfortunately, everything ends, and the death of a loved one is one of the most difficult challenges in life. Such a loss is accompanied by several stages which are extremely important to get over without harm to mental health. How to cope with your grief?
You feel shocked when you hear the news of death. First, you think, “Is this a joke? If it is so, then stop it right now.” The very thought that you will never see a beloved person alive seems unreal. You cannot believe that this is happening to you. We all think that death is far away, in the life of someone else. For example, it can be on the news and crime reports. It is not true!
The news was too unexpected for you. So, you understand that you can never do anything you want for the beloved person. You are angry. You are angry with the doctors or, perhaps, with the one who is to blame for your loss, with yourself, and with the whole world as well. You are angry that you have not been given even a minute to say the most important words to your loved one and to thank for everything.
- Depression and Bargaining
It is impossible to ignore the huge emptiness in your soul after the loss; it starts absorbing you. You do not want to go out because it seems that every person, passing by, will remind of the beloved one as if you can call them right now, and everything will be fine again. Everything looks like a horrible nightmare. Your red eyes have become an integral part of your image. You think all the time, “If only I…” You start bargaining with yourself and fate, living in the subjunctive mood.
In the end, you realize that this is not a joke and that the loved one will never come back. The pain has not gone away. It becomes one of the daily commitments. Therefore, you need to pull yourself together and move on. You should at least try. What did this person do for you? You should do the right things to make them proud.
How to Cope with Your Pain?
The loss of the loved one is the collapse of one small world. However, everyone gets healed sooner or later. Of course, it’s too hard to believe when you are just at the bottom of your grief. There are several tips which might help you.
- Give Loose to Feelings
Keeping it all inside will never be the right decision. If you do not release this pain, then over time, it will grow like a rolling snowball and crush you one day. It will be extremely difficult to recover. Therefore, if you want to cry, don’t restrain yourself. It helps.
To share your feelings with someone is very useful for rehabilitation. Most often, people want to keep out, thinking that no one will understand them. However, it is not true. By the way, a psychologist can become such a person. For example, parents and some friends may not understand the importance of that person in your life and simply do not understand why it can be so painful. Realize that you cannot handle it on your own, living in those thoughts and feelings all the time. You can tell everything to the psychologist. This talk will get off your chest and calm your heart.
- Do Something
The loss of a loved one, shock, and grief throw you off your stride. However, it is very important not to abandon your everyday activities. Going to work, cleaning the house, and even doing something will distract you from sad thoughts. You will be back on your regular schedule, and time will heal and deaden the pain.
Updated: January 23, 2017